Download Formats: M4V, AVI, MTS, MKV, M2TS, 3GP, ASF
original title: Parker
duration: 1h 58min
tags: To get away clean, you have to play dirty.
keywords: thief, heist, actionhero, basedonnovel, barebreasts, femalefrontalnudity, stabbing, realestateagent, disguise, hospital, leftfordead, stateflag, clownsuit, fistfight, shotmultipletimes, spittinginface
The movie drags, it is sloppy and it is amazing that pointless situations and acts that feature in this movie could drag for such a lengthy period. I think some directors and studios have a wish list of doing a movie with Jason Statham, because that will explain all the action anti-hero movie he has been doing that aren't worth your time. The only good thing in the movie and I'm surprised to be saying this is Jennifer Lopez, she was the only thing that made sense and her acting and comedy addition to this flick was impressive.
Taylor Hackford (Ray (2004) and The Devil's Advocate (1997)) directing skills is not in question in this flick, it is the story and the plot that takes you by storm on how dumb and boring it is for an action film. The movie plot is about a man named Parker (Jason Statham), I'm pretty sure you would have guessed that. Parker is a professional thief with morals as he doesn't steal from the poor or hurt the innocent. He was sent on a five-man job that was successful, the leader of the five-man crew asked Parker to go further with another plan that will earn them millions. Parker's refusal to go ahead with their plan led to him being shot and left for dead at a lake. But Parker survived (miraculously) and started to plan his revenge.
During his tracking down of the men that betrayed him, he came across Leslie Rogers (Jennifer Lopez) and she somehow got involved in his plan for revenge.
The movie is based on a book called Flashfire, and most definitely I may not be reading this book in the near future. Whacky as it is, Parker makes you wish you can rewind time and undo watching the movie because even at the end of the movie, you are unhappy that the hero survived.
My conclusion is there is a better way to waste your time, other than watching this movie. Parker, a.k.a. "Every other Jason Statham film ever...but this time with a ten gallon". I won't be going in a detailed review, because if you've seen one Jason Statham flick you've seen every Jason Statham flick. Don't believe me? Here are some common trends I've noticed across his other films also present in this one: 1. Obligatory scene where he runs away from the hospital, minutes after waking up from being shot, beaten and/or mauled by a bear - check. 2. Semi-anonymous protagonist that is just a ridiculous badass for no apparent reason - check. 3. Whatever dubious activities he takes part in are explained to the viewer as honorable in a "everyone gets dirty" kind of way, because you know, JS has a code he adheres to and that automatically makes crime acceptable - check. 4. Women are magnetically compelled to his junk by his mere presence - check. Fast and fancy cars, because. (No I didn't forget the rest of the sentence) - check. 5.Walking around seemingly unfazed with broken appendages, ribs, collar bones, multiple gunshot wounds, knife stabbing wounds and/or bear mace - check.
All and all it's an okayish film, if you've never seen another Jason Statham flick before, but at this point it's just stupid to keep casting him in the same role, in the same film, over and over. It's obvious he's not a brilliant actor, but he has a lot more to offer than what is currently being churned out. Speaking of acting don't get me started on Jeniffer Lopez - her acting is just wince-inducing. Apparently the director thought the same and cast her in the film as a walking butt to centre shots around in the time Jason is off screen, presumably to make JS' male fans feel less awkward and have an excuse about having an erection throughout the movie, because we all know how unsure of themselves "bros" are.
It's a completely forgettable film you will probably regret paying actual real world money to see, because you will feel like you've seen this film at least 4 other times. If you're going to saturate a film with so much violence, at least it's nice to see an action hero - or antihero - actually feeling the pain.
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